Beating Black Children = A SLAVE TRADITION = Racism/White Supremacy

Posted: November 29, 2013 in Uncategorized

Tonight, I happened to view a scene from an old Bette Davis movie, “The Little Foxes” and thought it spoke VOLUMES about the way black slaves were TRAINED to view AND treat black children — AND especially WHO we learned this behavior from.

Even among many black adults today there is a tendency to condemn and demean black children and struggling black youth for being born under impossibly bleak conditions.

pioneers_of_tv_miniseries

The callous and abusive behavior sometimes exhibited toward black children by often frustrated, stressed out black adults and parents has its roots in 400 years of Chattel Slavery.

Some historians believe that black slaves often PUBLICLY showed contempt for black children in order to appease their white slave-owners — AND as a way to protect their children from more vicious beatings–or worse–at the hands of the whites.

For example, a slave mother might beat her child in front of the slave-owner as a way of warding off a greater punishment. If a slave child was seen as “rebellious,” his or her parent might attempt to “break their spirit” so the slave-owner wouldn’t feel the need to.

An African mother and slave nursing for a white master's  baby.

African female slave nursing white master’s baby

While slaves and (so-called) freed blacks were unable and forbidden to properly care for their own children, they had to show deference and compassion toward the (white) children of their Victimizers.

please love our black children

Precious-11

Sadistic black mother in “Precious” movie

And we have all seen that “mean black mother” who curses and beats her children in public — and woe be the brave soul that dares to chastise or even suggest there might be a better way to communicate with her children. More than likely, that abusive black mother was abused herself as a child.

And the odds are that her parents were abused by their parents who were abused by their parents who were abused and so on from one slave generation to the next to the next–creating a unbroken GENERATIONAL CURSE that began during chattel slavery.

please love our black children

mother_child

Are black people just “mean” — OR are we are a  severely TRAUMATIZED PEOPLE who are still practicing the same SLAVE TRADITIONS that were FORCED on us during 400 YEARS of chattel slavery?

—–

((12/2/13 —  One poster (LBM) posted a comment I thought was too important not to include in this blogpost I decided to add it to the conversation):

“I think assigning the word “abuse” to what our enslaved ancestors and foreparents did may be unjust in what the intent was. For one thing, the enslaved were only harming fellow enslaved folk at the order of the plantation owner for fear of devaluing his property.  Indeed a child may have been chastised as a way to ward off the master but moreso, black mothers spoke down (and sometimes hit) their children in an often feeble attempt to keep them from being sold.  Sometimes enslaved children “acted the fool” to reduce their prospects of being sold.  The mental illness brought on by being enslaved indeed produced some vile behaviour that continued and often increased after emancipation.”

Thank you, LBM.

—–

To give some food for thought, I thought it would be constructive to include two book excerpts — one from ‘Black Rage’ and the second excerpt is from my book, ‘Black Love Is A Revolutionary Act’

The future of our black children hangs in the balance of what we do–as black adults. It’s crucial that we examine the emotions that drive our thoughts, speech and actions towards black children so they won’t pass along our destructive SLAVE TRADITIONS to the next generation.

(First Excerpt from Black Rage, by William H. Grier, M.D. and Price M. Cobbs)

Beating in child-rearing has its psychological roots in slavery

“The parent tells of a child both beloved and beaten, of a child taught to look for pain from even those who cherish him most, of a child who has come to feel that beatings are right and proper for him, and of a child whose view of the world, however gently it persuades him to act toward others, decrees for him that he is to be driven by the infliction of pain.

Pity that child.

Beating in child-rearing actually has its psychological roots in slavery and even yet black parents will feel that, just as they have suffered beatings as children, so it is right that their children be so treated. This kind of physical subjugation of the weak forges early in the mind of the child a link with the past and, as he learns the details of history, with slavery per se.”

END OF EXCERPT

(2nd Excerpt from ‘Black Love Is A Revolutionary Act’)

What Are “Slave Traditions?”

A “tradition” is a set of behaviors and beliefs that are passed from one generation to the next. Traditions provide the tools to civilize (or uncivilize) a group of people, and establish order (or disorder). The best traditions promote prosperity (economic survival), and build strong families (genetic survival). All human societies — whether “primitive” or “advanced” — are bound by TRADITIONS.

All human beings — if given free choice — will establish the kind of traditions that benefit their group. However, when a group’s natural traditions are destroyed and new traditions are created by their enemies, the predictable end result is disorder and chaos.

After African slaves were forced to abandon their original (civilizing) traditions, they had to adapt to the unnatural, barbaric traditions of the slave-owners that were DESIGNED to keep them ENSLAVED.

Blacks Mistreating Other Blacks Is A Slave Tradition

When slaves were tortured and killed for trying to protect each other, it is easy to understand why some blacks still feel it is UNNATURAL to trust, protect, OR cooperate with other blacks. It’s a SLAVE TRADITION.

When black authority on the plantation represented slaves brutalizing other slaves (doing the slave-owner’s dirty work), it is easy to understand why so many blacks still distrust “black authority” and are still fearful of “white authority.” It’s a SLAVE TRADITION.

When slaves were forced to witness the suffering of their loved ones and were helpless to stop it — which is still happening to blacks in the 21st century — it is easy to understand why some blacks today have become NUMB towards the suffering of other blacks. It’s a SLAVE TRADITION.

Avoiding Emotional Intimacy Is A Slave Tradition

When the parents of slave children were unable to protect their children from predatory slave-owners, it is easy to understand why so many black parents today still feel they cannot protect their children from street or law enforcement predators. It’s a SLAVE TRADITION.

When black males and females were forbidden to love each other, and lived with the daily terror that their loved ones could be sold to another plantation and never seen again, it is easy to understand why some blacks are still afraid of loving each other too much AND why it’s so easy to “love” someone white because we have no real emotional or spiritual attachment to them. It’s a SLAVE TRADITION.

Beating And Whipping Our Black Children Is A Slave Tradition

Black mothers (and fathers) beating and cursing their children in public is a common sight in many black communities. Slave mothers used to beat and curse their children in front of the slave-owner to prove their children needed no further punishment. Why do so many black parents today STILL feel it is in their children’s best interests to abuse them? It’s a SLAVE TRADITION.

END OF EXCERPT

Three things to keep in mind while viewing this video:

1. This movie was set in the year 1900, THIRTY-FIVE YEARS after black people were supposedly emancipated from slavery yet it’s obvious we were still FUNCTIONING as slaves.

2. The movie came from the imaginations of those early (white supremacist) Hollywood filmmakers who CLEARLY understood how blacks were TRAINED to deal with our black children.

3. The black adults are portrayed (by the filmmakers) as being more concerned about the welfare of whites, especially white females, than they were about other black people, especially black children.

The fear and confusion shown by the blacks in that kitchen as to whether to feed those hungry black children or send them away while the whites in that house dined like royalty — illustrates the dilemma we faced back then — and still face today:

Do we treat OTHER black people  humanely and put their welfare first — OR do we risk the wrath of racist man and racist woman?

UNFORTUNATELY, THE VIDEO OF ‘THE LITTLE FOXES’ I POSTED WAS REMOVED BY YOUTUBE FOR COPYRIGHT VIOLATIONS (OR SOME OTHER INSIDIOUS REASON) BUT HERE’S A DESCRIPTION OF THE SCENE:

The black servants were in the kitchen and several black children came to the back kitchen door and asked for food because they were hungry and some of the black adults angrily shooed them away (for fear of getting in trouble with the white people) but there was a black woman, I believe, who fed them. And prior to that I believe the white people were sitting at the dining table with a feast set out before them COOKED BY BLACK PEOPLE WHO COULD NOT FEED THEIR OWN.

if you really want to see the scene, I suggest you rent the movie from your local library (no use paying to rent or buy it). .

Comments
  1. Timothy says:

    You made great points. Co-workers who are black in real life tell stores openly to me about how they were beaten, cursed out, or smacked in the face all of the time by their parents. This issue is sensitive since you will face a lot whole of disagreement from many black human beings on this issue. On this issue, I agree with you. We have to treat each other right as a means to represent our true black African identity. We also should strongly reject slavery oriented traditions. It is hard for some of us to do this since much of those evil traditions have been engrained in our thinking. It can take years for some to eliminate that perverse slavery mentality from our minds. Children should not be treated as adults, but they should be treated as human beings though. That is the point. We have to inspire black children that they are somebody and that they can achieve great things with their own power and strength. No one is saying that children should experience no punishment, but children should experience fair treatment. Fair treatment is never equivalent to abuse at all. It is a shame that some grown black folks treat black children worse than white folks. That is why Black Unity and Black Love are so vital in our community.

    • GemGirl says:

      Timothy — Well-said!

      • Timothy says:

        Thank you GemGirl. I appreciate your words.

      • sharron Mctibbs says:

        This is a racist website!!! Blacks are not the only ones abused when they were kids!! So every time a black abuses their child whites are to blame. We blacks need to take responsibility for ourselves and our actions. We need to learn to work with each other to raise and look after our own communities. The only thing that is holding us back is ourselves. Yes I have experienced racism from whites and I have witnessed it from within our own community toward whites. We blacks are very prejudice towards whites that have never done a thing to us.

        • fatso says:

          Well blacks were the ones who were sold beat murdered raped robbed etc maybe your racist

          • Joseph Moon says:

            She was probably from one of the few black families that had the fortune of a sheltered upbringing. She knows not what she says. I agree with you fatso…I don’t think the article was/is racist, but rather an objective and even scientific view of true black history.

        • camilla says:

          I soooooo agree with you and me being brought up in a typical black community and being 67 years of age i totally agree with you in fact in my years white mothers and fathers would smack their children in public and so would blacks so to be honest every body is the same and shouldnt be upset abut that.

        • Joseph Moon says:

          You are just another case in point about blacks treating other blacks badly. Did you even read and understand what was written in the article? If so, try being beaten with a thin leather strap until your back bleeds, and the tub fills with bloody water… Then come talk to me. The article is correct! Slavery tradition is ALIVE AND WELL IN TODAY’S BLACK COMMUNITY! Period!

        • carolyn says:

          Right On!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Speak Truth to Power!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Timothy

      I agree, and the first step is acknowledging the problem.

    • a real black person says:

      why does someone that is not a part of a particular social group care to understand why others are the way they are. generally, well balanced adult black people look upon their childhood experiences with admiration. why does a group of people with next to no culture or tradition other than misery and hatred constantly concern itself with others setting boundaries and establishing consequences are the intended results of what you perceive as abuse. the difference in social issues of the different cultures is based on the different parenting approaches. critiquing anything without an understand of it is wrong.

      • TrojanPam says:

        @ a real black person

        For white supremacy to operate 7 days a week, 24 hours a day, there must be millions of dedicated foot soldiers who will run interference whenever their victims try to oppose it.

        It’s to be expected.

  2. Pam,

    This post intrigued me about Bette Davis. I found a YouTube clip of a Bette Davis appearance on The Tonight Show hosted by Johnny Carson in 1988. Both Bette Davis and Johnny Carson calmly talk about her performing “black” face.

    An authentic picture of Bette Davis in black face for her 70th birthday. This picture was shown to audience members and obviously a television audience. At one point Mrs. Davis even says she was “wearing a negro wig”.

    Johnny Carson sets the stage, pun intended, by stating “I had no idea what this picture was about”, right before he displays it to an audience. White people know EXACTLY what a system of White Terrorism is all about. Here is a link to this YouTube clip of this.

    Fast forward to 12:44 mark.

    Aaron

  3. […] Beating Black Children = A SLAVE TRADITION = Racism/White Supremacy | Racism Is White Supremacy. […]

  4. mstoogood4yall says:

    great post. I was not beaten as a child but I did get spankings a few times but mostly what worked for disciplining me was taking away things or not allowing me to go outside or doing more chores. I’ve seen some of the vids of black ppl whipping their kids and to me it is sometimes hard to watch. I’m torn as a part of me feels like sometimes time out and all that don’t work for some kids but at the same time there is a difference between discipline and abuse. My mom told me how her and her siblings were one time whooped with an extension cord, now I recognize that ,that is abuse. I don’t necessarily think a smack on the behind is abuse. But again I think any responsible parent will try different ways of discipline and adapt their techniques to fit with the kids of today. During slavery/jim crow obedience was a must for survival so the parents did try to do what they could to keep their child from acting up or just being a kid because that could entail a more severe punishment from whites.
    Now people are still doing that but it may not be working today because the kids today are different and technology plays a major role in our lives. I do think taking away a lot of the gadgets from kids works because it is something they feel attached to and some are addicted to ,that is why they freak out more when their stuff is taken away from them than when they are whooped. If/when I have kids I will try different techniques, taking away their stuff, making them do extra chores/volunteering,etc. I think a lot of kids nowadays also act up because of the excess energy and inactivity, kids were meant to be running around and burning energy but a lot are on their cellphones and tablets then add to that a sugary processed diet and its a disaster.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ mstoogood4yall

      My parents never whipped us but we got spankings. I agree, there’s a difference between discipline and abuse. A smack on the behind is not abuse, in my opinion.

      Hitting someone in the face or hitting them with a object, that’s abuse. And a lot of this abuse is really about the parent being frustrated about things that had nothing to do with their children.

      I agree, it’s a different world due to technology but one thing never changes. If your child respects you (because you have values and self-respect and walk the talk) your chances of disciplining them I think has a better chance.

      • ta says:

        i am so glad that there is someone who states that objects thrown that hit is abuse; my mother threw a lid at me and cut my head; i am still angry because i hadn’t done anything wrong; my youngest brother wanted the ball i was playing with when i didnt give it to him he went crying to mother which led to the lid of a pot being thrown at me.

        black parents for the most part don’t listen, i am a christian man taught to forgive which i have; but i am not close to my mother at all. when i see injustice as such done to other children; i get very angry.

        there was no apology; i pray about this but i am still angry.

        i say this to all parents listen to your children; to this day i dont feel a close relationship with my mother at all; and i am saddened by this; but this is what happens when you demean curse,
        and use objects to hit your kids with; where in scripture does it say abuse your children or draw blood???

        your kids are not slaves dont treat them as such

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ ta

          I’m sorry to hear about your relationship with your mother. I would not be surprised if she bore the same anger toward her mother and/or father that you feel. Unfortunately, child abuse often becomes a generational curse, passed along from generation to generation until someone who has been abused decides to break the chain.

          I find that the lower the self-esteem, the less likely there will be an apology. A lot of our behavior comes from our slave experience and our degradation within a system of white supremacy. I don’t have any answers but I hope one day you will forgive your mother. On some level she may be aware that she has damaged her children but has no coping mechanism to deal with it.

          Live your life to the best of your ability and try NOT to repeat her mistakes. Take care.

  5. […] Beating Black Children = A SLAVE TRADITION = Racism/White Supremacy  on RacismWs.com […]

  6. Craig says:

    Perfectly explained, u are exactly right. I didn’t get many beatings as a kid, my grandma never let my granddaddy beat me, he was a good man, but in his younger years he wasnt as mellow, I got whupped with little switches, cursing was a thing non existent in my house because of religion, no smoking , no drinking either, but I have cousins who mama beat them with a big ole switch u could call it a pole, and some other younger generation mamas who are my cousins beat thier kids with cords(I’ve never seen it but when my cousin who got beat with them kind of laugh about it like it was a badge of honor.) If I ever got beat with a cord when I was little I would probably be in prison right now.

    But the whole reasoning behind my grandma telling people to beat their kids when they do wrong was the bible verse, “spare the rod spoil the child” But as I got older an is able to understand things better, the bible never says what the rod is or how hard to swing the rod or even swing it at all, it could have just meant a direction.

    Like some kids get beat but they don’t get taught, some kids don’t get beat an still don’t get taught, I have this problem with my aunt an my lil cousin now hes 13, hes good, when he does wrong she threatens to beat him but he never gets a beating and he don’t learn nothing in the process, and when he gets privileges taken away its not long enough to mean anything. So I say beating a child does nothing but bad things to their mind without direction and discipline in every other aspect of their life, like dont wait until a kids does something real bad, cause the little things add up. And isnt it telling and a shame how everything psychologically goes back to slavery, an u have these white folk talking about that was the past and to get over it, they say the same with the Natives.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Craig

      When you said, “But the whole reasoning behind my grandma telling people to beat their kids when they do wrong was the bible verse, “spare the rod spoil the child” —

      I thought about WHO interpreted that Bible verse for us to mean that we should beat our children?

      The white slave-owner, who used the same Bible to justify his brutality.

      That’s why I believe our religion is a SLAVE TRADITION — and this is not a slam against any particular religion

      BUT I do have a problem with practicing the same religion in the SAME way that the slave-owner taught us on the plantation (because this was not our religion prior to slavery)

      I think this SPIRITUAL DISCONNECT (of practicing the religion your oppressor gave you and worshiping HIS GOD) has worked against us

      Otherwise, why would black people have a church on every corner and hell in between?

      Black churches are BIGGEST black-owned businesses on the block YET they produce nothing and put almost no one (except the preacher) to work

      instead of having MEGA churches we should be creating MEGA businesses that MAKE STUFF and put black people to work —

      and try to REDISCOVER our TRUE religion and our TRUE GOD

      That’s why I think the ONLY black institutions that the white supremacy system tolerates and does not try to derail are black churches

      because they KNOW our churches are carrying on the SLAVE TRADITION white slave-owners taught us

      that made us SUBMIT TO WHITE DOMINATION

      And in many cases the images in our Bibles and on the church walls are still those of a WHITE JESUS AND SHEPHERDS

      meaning, if JESUS IS WHITE — SO IS GOD — which means the WHITE MAN is GOD — which is why it feels so natural to worship white people and to obey them

      and why it feels so NOT RIGHT to disobey or displease them

      Like Malcolm X said:

      “So you call for the same God he calls for.
      When he’s putting a rope around your neck,
      you call for God and he calls for God.
      And you wonder why the one you call on
      never answers you.”

      • U are right. Just like there is all these different versions of the bible, I know it was used for good and evil, and the interpretation of that verse I know was used for evil, I know people who dont even study the bible or follow any of Jesus simple teachings like respect your neighbor repeating that verse ha.

        But I knew about those churches since I was young I never actually attended a traditional church but seen them on tv cause My grandparents were out of that an into Jehovah’s witnesses, so they knew all about black churches, but yeah I question all religion, because if u are searching for God out of all these documents available to us he has to be their somewhere and we have to not be fooled by these greedy unholy preachers either. Its so sad when I see black people in these mega churches still right after the preacher has been accused of crimes they aren’t attracted to his teaching they are attracted to the celebrity. Some Black preachers do spit that real though with education Like Jeremiah Wright and Gino Jennings(whether they are true or not, I appreciate them actually handing out knowledge to people who otherwise would be fooled by these Celebrities like TD Jakes and Creflo , and Eddie Long.) Although I believe none of them are actually anointed by God according to my religion and bible, a few do drop that knowledge.

        Black churches are BIGGEST black-owned businesses on the block YET they produce nothing and put almost no one (except the preacher) to work. <<That sums it up.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ Craig

          All the different versions exist for a reason and I suspect they were written to support an agenda.

          I agree, there are black preachers who are sincere but there are many who are “pimping” from the pulpit.

          Isn’t the goal of being a Christian to be “Christ-like?” If that’s true, how can a church become a platform for material excess and still teach the gospel?

          How can a preacher/pastor wear two-thousand dollar suits and drive a $150,000 card and live in a million-dollar home and claim to be “Christ-like?” —

          especially if the members of that church can hardly pay their light bills? how is that not pimping?

          Just asking…

      • Sam says:

        I wanted to touch on the ‘spare the rod, spoil the child’ saying. I was taught during a pastoral sermon in church that all these years we may have been misinterpreting this line in the Bible. You could say ‘spare the rod, spoil the child’ means if you don’t spank your child you were going to spoil them. My pastor gave a different perspective of this bible term, that I found very interesting. He said in the time the bible was written there were a lot of shephards and shephards used rods to guide their sheep. With that being said, ‘spare the rod, spoil the child’ interpreted as a rod staff a shephard would use. Would mean the saying could possibly mean spare the guidance your child needs to grow, then you could be spoiling them. Just saying…

      • Sharon says:

        Another thing to remember is it was almost a crime to teach slaves how to read and write because the slave-master feared the slaves would learn to think for themselves. So when the slaves were permitted to read, great emphasis was also put on another scripture Ephesians 6:5 ‘Slaves obey your masters.’

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ Sharon

          Which is why CHRISTIANITY was taught to African slaves AND Africans by white “missionaries”

          To teach us to submit to white domination

          (I’m not blaming Christianity, but the way it was used AND who taught it to us).

      • George says:

        Pam, regarding the ‘spare the rod, spoil the child’ verse, i think as people have previously mentioned there is a difference between discipline and being beaten.

        You mention many good points, but i believe that elements like that in the Bible should not be translated 100% literally. Personally I believe in disciplining your children, i was and I turned out alright, however beating your child is 100% different, as my father always said, ‘it can never be out of anger’

        And Jesus was not white, due to the region he was from, he would of looked Middle Eastern. Personally I like Islam’s approach to their Prophet – he shall never be depicted for fear that people will worship that depiction.
        However Islam is certainly not perfect, and many so called Muslim countries still treat many Indians like slaves.

        For me religion is entirely personal, and we should each take from it what we believe to be right. Any other human that tells you how to take it is wrong in that it should be entirely up to you

  7. Joe says:

    Great post. In my later yrs ive started to pay attention to how woman treat their kids. My mother and her sisters and grandmother all vebally abused us.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Joe

      Not to make excuses for abusive mothers and female relatives, but more than likely they were abused as children. Many are hurt and angry that they have to raise their children alone. Some have been sexually assaulted as young girls and as adult women. Many black females are angry for a variety of reasons. Unfortunately, some are so angry and hurt that they take out their pain on their children.

      And when you trace it back, the origins of our anger and pain go back to slavery.

  8. This is a discussion that we black people need to have. Thank you.

  9. Sharon says:

    As a child I saw several children abused and even as a child I knew, instinctly, something was wrong with this but at the time did not realize it was a slave tradition. One example of severe abuse that I witnessed happened to one of my cousins at the hands of both her stepmother and her father. Her father mostly did the abuse in private but you could see the bruises when she came to school. The stepmother was a school teacher and I saw 2 things she did to my cousin that I can’t forget because she did it at the school so the whole world could see:
    1) My cousin was standing at the blackboard writing, and for no reason at all, she sneaked up behind her and slapped her in the back of her head so hard, her head went into blackboard.
    2) Also, she once took her to a room, near a classroom full of students, locked the room so she could not run, and beat her non-stop for a long time. When she came out of the room, welts were all over her body and her hair was all over her head.
    People don’t realize it but this kind of abuse also traumatizes the children witnessing the abuse even though it is not happening to them. The sad part is to the best of my knowledge during that era, there were no laws to protect children and if you reported this to other adults, you were told to ‘mind your own business’ and some even said this would make her a better person.
    Well, needless to say, her life turned out a mess. Once she got old enough, she ran away to her biological mother but she was so damaged already that she ended up having 6 children by different men, got on drugs, did jail time for stealing (one of her own children had her arrested for making unauthorized purchases on her credit card) and she died in her late 50s, some say from AIDS.
    I know the above may be an extreme case of abuse but I witnessed other situations like this as a child and most of the time the parents did it to the female child. I did not witness that much abuse toward male children by the parents. I could not figure out why they were so hard on the girls. This kind of abuse has to have been passed on from slavery because it is no way someone can say they love their child and turn around and abuse them like this.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Sharon

      As terrible as your story is, it’s not uncommon–unfortunately. When I was a little girl, a single mother and her kids lived in the building next door. Everyday without fail she would beat her son. It was so loud we could hear it in the next building.

      I used to sit in the house, scared, and wondering what in the world “Junior” could have done that he deserved a beating every day?

      Not surprisingly, Junior became a gang member–and at one time, he was the leader of this gang.

      That’s what I mean by the generational curse that started with slavery and how the damage is passed along to the next generation UNLESS WE STOP IT

      The frustrated and angry mother who abuses her sons may lead black males to shun black females as wives and lovers when they become adults.

      The same is true for black girls who are abused by black male adults and sometimes wind up avoiding relationships with black males. I know this is true because it happened within my family circle.

      Beating and abusing our children literally rips our families and communities apart.

      It’s time we be honest about what we’re doing and why.

  10. Mbeti says:

    I experienced years of this from my mother so intensely that when she died I was greatly relieved.

    I’m still searching for the psychological impact this has had on me ,one thing – I have a bad temper one of the reasons why I’ve given up on having a pet – same pattern happens , I get frustrated and start physical abuse.
    And while I would like to have a mate and family If I can’t cure this in myself I much rather not – and thus I’m doing any future woman and children a favor.

    As to that film up there – I still watch a lot of film and tv – mostly of the extreme violent type (might figure) but that old demeaning crap is only good for clinical and historic research – not entertainment.

    Thank you for exposing and investigating a important aspect of why there is the level of black on black violence there is.

    • jamesrowdy29 says:

      Well damn man. But I cant just let u slide with putting all that on your mama, cause when people do crazy stuff like these white boys shooting up schools they always looking for a reason, when the reason is just because they wanted too. U may have issues from your mom, but U also need to practice self discipline and self control. Your problem sound deeper than your mama cause u said u cant even have a pet!, an animal is an animal no more no less if u cant have one of those without doing something harsh too it, u need to really talk to somebody, and what do u call old demeaning crap? Damn homie, if u telling the truth I would be afraid of u.

      But u gotta let go, I dont know if u are young or old but u cant keep putting it on your momma, thats the easy way out. But I do hope u get the help u need, but u gotta let all that hurt go

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Mbeti

      I’m sorry to hear about your abuse. Since you’re the one who experienced it, you have a right to feel anyway that you feel.

      Of course, the abuse you experienced shaped the person you are now, but the challenge in life is to live it and not let the past rule your future and your present.

      I had a lot of anger, too, stemming from my relationship with my father but you know what helped me?

      reminding myself that my father was a human being who had been damaged, too

      my father had a difficult childhood and was abandoned by his father. He also grew up during segregation and had to endure a lot of abuse at the hands of racist whites.

      But despite all that, he never left us, always kept a job, and we always had a roof over our heads and food on the table and toys at Christmas.

      In other words, he did the best he could with what he had so I had to forgive him for the things he couldn’t be and for the things he did that he shouldn’t have done.

      the biggest gift you can give yourself where your parents are concerned is FORGIVENESS.

    • Sharon says:

      Mbeti: I am sorry to hear about the abuse you experienced. However, the good news is that you recognize there is a problem and are trying to get beyond it. I understand it is difficult to get beyond traumatizing experiences. Just like there are a physical scars, there are mental scars and the mental ones are more difficult simply because they are not visible. It is my hope though that you will continue to heal.

  11. TrojanPam says:

    We know our children are going to be abused outside our homes

    We must work HARDER to stop the abuse INSIDE

    Racism/White Supremacy is a GLOBAL, WORLDWIDE SYSTEM

    • mstoogood4yall says:

      wow that vid is disgusting had this happened here u know he would’ve been shot not tazed. I agree that we must work on getting rid of abuse within our own homes and communities, it makes no sense for kids to have to deal with crap from the outside world as well as at home. i’m fortunate not to have been abused by my parents but we also must protect kids from other kids as well. don’t leave kids with each other supervise them and I know it may sound paranoid but don’t let them have sleep overs either too many people have been molested from being unsupervised with people their parents thought they could trust. we must break the cycle to all the destructive behavior

      • TrojanPam says:

        @ mstoogood4yall

        I agree, had it happened in Chicago, that young man would have been shot.

        I also agree parents have to be vigilant and not just about their children, but watch out for all the children as best we can.

        The world is increasingly a dangerous place for children.

    • camilla says:

      why the hell would he do that… what did the kid do to him

  12. If any and everyone reads the willie lench letter, you will know the psychological problems of alot of black ppl, its not all our fault, yet the system in this country is made to keep blacks down, and please no one say that with all the opportunities afforded that we as a ppl can do better. ITS ENGRAVED!!

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ halfcentutyservived

      I compare the plight of blacks in america to abused children who, after spending their ENTIRE CHILDHOOD being abused, are somehow expected to make a miraculous recovery simply because they reach the legal age.

      Black people have always been in the sights of the white supremacy system since slavery, and nothing but the surface appearance has changed. We are still on the plantation and are still seen as “property” — in EVERY respect.

      That’s why it’s really not illegal for a white person to kill a black person.

      Because no one goes to prison for destroying their own property

  13. Not returning to follow up says:

    I’d love to see an article on why blacks still follow a religion forced upon then by these same slave owners. Interesting article as a child who was dealt with behind closed doors and never in public. I see a lot of friends who weren’t punished at all and they are dead or in jail. Then I see young mothers who are willing to beat their toddlers in public treating them like adults at an early age.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Not returning to follow up

      I plan to do a post in the future on religion, so I suggest you sign the mailing list so you’ll be notified.

      I have seen all the above that you mentioned and it does seem in many cases that it’s either feast or famine. Either too much “discipline” (verbal and physical abuse)

      OR too little discipline. I also see a lot of parents who (for unresolved emotional issues of their own) are more focused on their sexual/social lives than on the welfare of their children

      I work with parents who spent their children’s most important developmental years AT work working a TON of overtime, not out of necessity but to buy luxury cars, bigger homes, and a lot of material things that brought no real happiness to their lives or their children’s.

      Some of us think raising children means putting a roof over their heads, food on the table, and clothes on their backs, cursing or spanking when they displease us– and that our leisure time should be spent on some ME TIME

      when in reality, our children need emotional support and encouragement MORE than they need the newest I Phone or video game.

      I’m not slamming black parents OR parents in general, but I think we have lost our way and need to really look at what we are trying to achieve with our children

      Do we want strong minded children who can face a racist world? Or do we want children who will be cannon fodder for the military complex or the prison industrial system?

  14. Vida says:

    To the author of this article
    So explain what happened to me?? Since I am Sicilian southern Italian Russian n Polish? I got beatings as a child borderline child abuse n I do punish my daughter either spanking or otherwise embarrassing her in public… Although my man who is Jamaican say I still soft on her but others would look me as being hard on her.. But I’m pale as Casper the ghost so do explain ur theory???

    Yes… Kno history bcuz knowledge is power… But continuing to further racism as u are indirectly doing in this article keeps its ugly head still roaring… U doing the same fuckry as white ppl did and many still do by spreading theories… Yes again know history but stop repeating it.. Bcuz stuff like this is what the racist ones WANT YOU to spread to keep the hate alive on all sides…

    Regardless of our skin tones we are ALL HUMAN BEINGS ONE RACE..ONE BLOOD.. bleed the same.. And are equal regardless to what is pushed… Yes I’m white.. Yes my man black.. Yes I really don’t chill with white ppl bcuz of their ignorance… And I’d be damned to repeat their stupidity.. But I see all skin tones with racist viewpoints n this has to end. My child only 8 and I had to teach her bout racism bcuz she is mixed and has a white mother… That’s shameful in this day and age.

    P.s. technically got a bit a black ina my blood.. Sicilians are said to have black in their blood but dnt say that to them.. they will chop u head off for it.. I’m the only one to admit it…

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Vida

      What I find interesting about (some) of the whites who post on black blogs is their attempt to REDIRECT the conversation AWAY from racism/white supremacy. It seems black people should NEVER be allowed to have (or control) a dialogue about our experiences WITHOUT (some) whites demanding (and needing) to insert themselves right in the middle and command center stage to talk about what happened to them.

      Just to be clear, it is not my JOB nor my MISSION to explain anything that happens to white people within their own homes. There are other people who are more qualified to talk or write about that than me. What I’m more concerned about is what white people DO to black people OUTSIDE their homes. That’s why this blog is called RACISM IS WHITE SUPREMACY.

      This particular blog post is about BLACK CHILDREN and what BLACK PEOPLE need to understand AND change about the way we treat our children. This blog post is NOT about child abuse in general NOR did I state that child abuse does not occur elsewhere.

      That your parents beat you is unfortunate, but I suggest YOU start a dialogue with them — or with other Italian, Polish, Sicilian people, or create your own blog to address that issue.

      It is also very telling (and suspicious) that every time black people talk about our history of mistreatment and oppression under the system of white supremacy that (some) whites feel that is promoting racism and hatred. Yet, they feel they have the RIGHT to (FORCE ME) to learn their history and congratulate themselves for waging WARS against nations some of who have NEVER harmed them.

      This attitude is a form of DECEPTION and an attempt to DERAIL legitimate dialogue between the VICTIMS of white supremacy. (that won’t work here).

      What’s even sadder is YOU have a non-white child who will one day NEED to have a SANE understanding of how and why she is being mistreated is because she is not white — and equally sad is she will not get that from you–which is why I’m against black people having non-white children with white people. The child is always at a psychological disadvantage, and in fact, is often a Victim of racism by the same parents who are often practicing racism themselves against other non-whites.

      The ONLY time I hear that INSINCERE RHETORIC that “we are all human beings” is when black people start to TALK about what is happening to us AND pull the covers off as to the reasons WHY.

      Whether you have “black blood” or you have a CONFUSED black male in your life or not, you will get no brownie points here. There are many whites who are “hang out” and/or “sex” blacks who are just as racist as the ones who don’t.

      Especially since “Sicilian and Italian” people are some of the most openly racist people in the U.S. AND worldwide, due, I suspect, to their FEAR that someone will connect their dark hair, skin, and eyes with the AFRICANS (MOORS) WHO CONQUERED THEM. I agree with you that this FACT is something that most Italians (and Sicilians) refuse to deal with.

      And that is why I have this blog and write books to help other black people understand what white supremacy is AND how it is practiced, especially by those who want to pretend it doesn’t exist.

      • Sharon says:

        Pam, I love the way you shut these folk like Vida down. It is very clear this blog is about a slave tradition passed from one generation to another and not about general child abuse.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ Sharon

          It’s something I’ve come to expect. Some whites will try to derail OR redirect ANY legitimate conversation about our victimization under the system of racism/white supremacy.

          They are doing what they have to do to PRESERVE their system of white domination and privilege — and to do that they MUST keep their Victims ignorant and self-hating.

          Because as long as their Victims do NOT understand what is happening, they can continue to victimize, confuse, exploit, sex, and kill them.

          Understanding white supremacy is the SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT THING a black person can do. Once you understand how it works, you will be surprised by the increasing number of things you understand.

          I hope you’ll check out my Counter-Racism Boot Camp

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ Sharon

          this attitude is common among white females who are sexing black males. They are ENCOURAGED by their black “partners” to think they have the superior RIGHT to intrude or barge in on whatever black people are doing. That’s why it’s common to see white females loitering around black clubs and events where they KNOW they will be catered to.

          I’ve found that many white females who are sexing and breeding with black males are just as racist as those who don’t. My third book, “The Interracial Con Game” explains in great detail the mindset of a racist who is sexually involved with a black male or female.

  15. Grace says:

    While I agree with the fact that something must be done to change this tradition of physical violence against children, I believe the author of this article needs to take into account something else. I lived in Sub-Saharan Africa for the past 2 years and witnessed on almost a daily basis black men and women beating their children for even the smallest of infractions such as dropping a dish. In the country where I lived, it is extremely common for parents to beat their children or even for strangers to hit another person’s child who is acting out. Children, in turn, often become violent with one another. Spousal abuse is a serious problem as well. Even if slavery had a significant impact on how black parents treat their children, the author needs to consider what influence the African tradition has had on modern behaviors and mentalities instead of attributing it to just one source. Once again, I’m not refuting that one source, just pointing out that what I saw in Africa (by people who had never even met a white person) was very shocking to me and merits exploration. On many occasions, the beatings I witnessed there were worse than anything I’ve seen done in the U.S. by African-Americans.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Grace,

      Most of Africa has been colonized by European so it is impossible–in my opinion–to judge African nations as though they have been isolated from the effects of white supremacy. I assure you, they have not.

      The point I’m making in this post is NOT that other people or nations don’t abuse their children. Of course they do.

      The point I’m making is that our UNIQUE experience as former slaves AND descendants of 400 years of slavery has left an indelible and devastating impression upon our psyches. And that DAMAGE has created a pattern of behavior that needs to be HONESTLY looked at and changed.

      I assure you, even Africans in the Sub-Suhara had been affected by white supremacy because white supremacy is the SINGLE GREATEST CAUSE of GENOCIDE and WARFARE in the Sub Sahara AND the rest of Africa.

      In addition, the majority of Africans — to my knowledge– have been exposed to white supremacy in one form or another, especially via movies and entertainment–and religion. Otherwise, why would so many Africans be practicing the religion of Christianity taught them my white missionaries? Even in the Sub Sahara, where Christianity is prevalent?

      Here’s some info about Sub Sahara Africa you might find interesting. There are a lot of links you can Google:

      ——–

      Factors that led European countries to colonize Sub-Saharan Africa

      Colonization

      Colonization is a Latin word derived from Colore which means to inhabit, frequent practice, guard, respect as it is originally use for humans. Human colonization is not broad as colonialism. Colonization mostly refers to migration. The example of colonization is colonies settlers, plantations, trading posts and it also deals with ruling other regions where people are already living.

      Colonization in Africa

      In the end of 19th century the African continent was almost shared between the Europeans. Only few places which were at the border of Sahara were left. In the start of 20th century they were also covered by France and Italy. Due to such rapid colonization Africa was appropriated and penetrated into geographical developments. The colonization in Africa ended in the end of 20th century.

      Factors of Colonizing Sub-Saharan Africa

      There were some factors due to which Europeans and other countries colonized Africa. Five factors for the colonization of Sub-Saharan Africa by Europeans are described below:

      Minerals

      One of the main reasons behind the colonization of Sub-Saharan Africa was oil and minerals. Africa is one of the largest exporters of minerals in the whole world. Africa is rich in Gold, copper, uranium, antimony, bauxite, vanadium, iron and manganese. South Africa mostly exports manganese and chromium. It has 75% reserves of chromium. It is the largest producer of platinum and produces 80% of the world annually and has reserves of 88% in the world. Sub-Saharan also produce 33% of bauxite and copper. This region produces 49% of diamond and 30% of gold globally.

      Oil

      Another reason for the colonization is that South Africa produce about 42% of the world’s oil. Sub-Saharan’s oil is of very good quality and have low amount of sulfur in it because of which less refining is required.

      Agriculture

      Sub-Saharan is the largest producer of grains in the world. The gains of Sub-Saharan are export in many places of the world. There are also many other agricultural products which are produced and export in the rest of the world. These crops are; cotton, beans, watermelon and coffee.

      Christianity

      The last reason for the colonization of Sub-Saharan was that British wanted to spread their religion Christianity in Sub-Saharan. The reason behind choosing Sub-Saharan was that the population of this region was too large at that time and they thought that if they will rule that place so people will follow their religion. This did not came to appear after the colonization instead there were many disadvantages of colonization and negative impacts which in the end African had to face.

      The above are the five factors why Europeans colonized Sub-Sahara. It has mineral, gold, diamonds, agriculture and a good geographic location…

      http://www.researchomatic.com/Factors-That-Led-European-Countries-To-Colonize-SubSaharan-Africa-40347.html

      END OF EXCERPT

      ————————

      Of course, it is common knowledge that Europeans control (have stolen) the vast majority of precious mineral mines in African nations. A very visible sign of White supremacy programming are the growing number of Africans who are bleaching their skin (which causes leprosy and other diseases).

      What I find most troubling is so many black people–who descended from slavery– that REFUSE to recognize the damage done by 400 years of chattel slavery, and who see their OWN history through distorted white eyes.

      That alone speaks VOLUMES about just how much psychological damage to the descendants of former slaves.

      As to whether the Sub Saharan African people you met that you say have never seen a white person, I have three questions:

      1. What is the name of the area you visited?
      2. Did one or all of them tell you in conversation that they had never seen a white person?
      3. On your trip to Africa, are you saying you never saw a white person, not at the airport in Africa, or anywhere once you landed in Africa?

      • Sharon says:

        Pam, I commend you for being so knowledgeable about white supremacy. Just like slavery messed us up over here, colonialism has messed up Africa over there also.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ Sharon

          Exactly!

          it is IMPOSSIBLE to talk about Africa without acknowledging 200 plus years of European colonialism. This is what I mean about NOT KNOWING anything about our history.

          African has been greatly victimized by white supremacy on every imaginable level.

          From African people practicing Christianity taught by white supremacist missionaries, to whites forcing blacks to work for starvation wages mining their OWN RESOURCES in gold and diamond mines, to provoking tribal wars, to hiring goons to mass rape African females and drive them off their land, to poisoning rivers, to distributing GMO seeds and food that make people sterile, to using biological weapons that infect Africans with the HIV and Eboli viruses, to African people so psychologically traumatized that some are bleaching their beautiful, melanated skin and getting leprosy and other life-threatening diseases.

          That is why it’s IMPORTANT to know AND respect our history. Then you can make the logical links between your past and present so you can BUILD a better future based on KNOWLEDGE of what has happened to you and your kind.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ Sharon

          Absolutely. I don’t know why so many people seem to think Africa was not colonized by Europeans when clearly, whites control a great deal of the continent’s wealth.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Grace

      white supremacy doesn’t carry a banner or a sign warning blacks or non-whites that it is present. I can go to many poor black neighborhoods in Chicago, for example, and not see a white person all day

      BUT

      I know that the people who control the schools (and closed over 80 of them this year) and the police, and the fire and the hiring and firing and food distribution and electric, and water, and gas, and gasoline, and alcohol and licenses and banks and credit unions and who gets a loan or a promotion or a new street lamp or sidewalk repaired or a boot on their car, etc, etc, etc,

      ALL ARE WHITE PEOPLE

      even if i NEVER see a white person that entire day

  16. Dan says:

    I wonder those who write crap like these, do they dream it in the night or do they find inspiration from the written in the fortune cookies? What a bunch of bullshit, good think some people’s comment agree with what i’m saying, well nice try for the attempt to brainwash people into this stupidity in 2013…
    Parents do that all over the world, whatever race and nationality they are, ask my granny how much beating she and her brothers and sisters were getting from her mom as kid, back in the days in Italy (Glad that chanced a bit) parents were beating up kids with all sort of kicthen utensils, wooden slippers, clothes beater (the one for beds) or the wooden thing to wash clothes with (I still remember how does the wooden slipper feels on the skin), in front of other people too most of the time, I’m against violence especially towards kids and women, but sometime I wonder if all the beating when I was a kid teach me something and not to act like Sharkisha and friends these days. Some time a little slap from a parent may be worth something too when a kid grow up.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Dan

      Two things:

      1. If you come to someone’s blog and cannot conduct yourself in a CIVIL MANNER without using profanity (aka bullshit), that speaks more about YOU than the person who wrote the “crap.”

      2. If you do not understand the point being made — that slavery was a unique experience that created certain behaviors in the victims and their descendants — then I suggest you find another blog more to your liking.

  17. LBM says:

    I think assigning the word “abuse” to what our enslaved ancestors and foreparents did may be unjust in what the intent was. For one thing, the enslaved were only harming fellow enslaved folk at the order of the plantation owner for fear of devaluing his property. Indeed a child may have been chastised as a way to ward off the master but moreso, black mothers spoke down (and sometimes hit) their children in an often feeble attempt to keep them from being sold.Sometimes enslaved children “acted the fool” to reduce their prospects of being sold.

    The mental illness brought on by being enslaved indeed produced some vile behaviour that continued and often increased after emancipation.

    I think if we’re going to call enslaved mothers “child abusers” we will also have to call enslaved males “child rapists”. An enslaved girl was expected to start breeding as soon as her menes started. The “buck” who was sent to “take her” was not 11 or 12 as she was. I’m sure black males who were forced to be breeding bucks would not want to be looked back upon as rapists.

    Now when we analyze that much of the beating and raping continues today – of course we can make the correlation, but now we can update the intent and perhaps the labeling.

  18. kowaba says:

    This topic hits close to home. When I was a kid, I remember clearly that my father took a belt and beat my brother like a slave master would to a slave. It was terrible. It happened at least on two separate occasions; my mother stormed into the room and told my father to stop hitting my brother. I was confused by all of it and knew that beating a child with a belt was crossing the line. My mother was beat as a child with sticks, but she’s not even black. When growing my siblings and I would get a slap on the hand AFTER my mother counted down and warned us; I found this could be an effective way of disciplining children.

    As I work in a school, I can assure you that there are many children there that are not disciplined at all by their parents. They talk back and cry if I take away a privilege, like recess, after I warned them what would happen if they make that choice. This usually happens only one or two times; then the children learn that they can’t do these things with me. Just being firm and following through works wonders. Children need to understand that there are consequences to their actions. They also need to learn that developing self control can have its rewards. Both extremes, being too lax and doting on children or being overly rigid, abusive, and not explaining why something is being taken away is detrimental to the child. I don’t know if many parents realize this and are just following the footsteps of their parents; but I know if I ever decided to have children I would make a lot of changes to how they would be raised compared to how I was raised.

    • kowaba says:

      Oops. I just realized that I made a typo. I meant that my father took a belt and beat my older brother.

      @ TrojanPam, do you think this psychological devastation that the slaves in the U.S. encountered was worse in the Caribbean? From what I’ve read in some historical accounts, if a slave in the U.S. was difficult the plantation owner would send the slave down the river to the deep south. I think if the slave was still giving problems they would be sent to the islands. What’s your take on it? Do you think Black Americans should discuss more of the African Diaspora even extending to countries that do not speak English, places like Brazil, Haiti, and Cuba?

      • TrojanPam says:

        @ Kowaba

        I corrected the typo

        I can’t say if it was worse, but I think ANY people who were subjected to the brutality of chattel slavery are going to internalize it and act it out. The more brutal it was, the more damaged the people.

        I detail what happened during slavery in “Black Love Is A Revolutionary Act” and would love to hear from our brothers and sisters in places like Brazil, Haiti, and Cuba for what their experiences have been.

        So if anyone from that part of the world is reading this, we would love your input

        • kowaba says:

          @Trojan Pam

          Thank you for correcting the typo. My brother lived a few years in Brazil and told me that the dynamics of whites and blacks there is like Jim Crow South. When my father went to visit my brother there, they saw black people waiting in long lines out of white restaurants onto the streets. The waiters in the restaurant would say oh we have no more room, and inside the restaurant there would only be two white people in there and the rest of the restaurant would be empty. White Brazilians would expect a Black Brazilian walking by to open a door for them in passing. From my brother’s account, he said that the black Brazilians he has met are very happy and don’t think anything of this because they don’t know anything else. There is a documentary called, “I Am Happy” where it outlines the Black people there and their attitudes. It’s worth checking out, I think.

          I believe the lack of emphasis on slavery being a global trading system in the academic curricula in schools is done on purpose to further divide and conquer the different nationalities of black people that come to the U.S.

          • TrojanPam says:

            @ kowaba

            That’s why I say white supremacy is a GLOBAL SYSTEM — where white people have created a system that mistreats people BASED ON COLOR — and the darker you are , the worst you are treated, whether you are in the U.S., Europe, Russia, Canada, Switzerland (just ask Oprah who tried to buy a purse), Sweden, etc.

            And the most effective way to maintain the system is to get black or non-white people to attack each other, ignore their oppression, and LOVE/SEX their OPPRESSORS.

      • Sharon says:

        Kowaba: It is interesting that you mentioned slavery in the Caribbean. I remembered an incident once when I was visiting Ananberg Ruins in St. John, Virgin Island. This was once a slave plantation and our tour guide was giving us information as we were standing in the middle of a cane field. I hear cane plantations were more brutal than cotton fields. Anyway, this strange feeling came over me as if I could feel my ancestors’ pain. It was so intense I dismissed myself and went back to the tour bus. I wonder if this has to do with racial memories passed along?

        • kowaba says:

          @ Sharon

          Thank you for sharing your story. I brought up the Caribbean because my father is from there; he’s Trini. My father told me that his ancestors harvested sugar cane. As a child, I remember him bringing home sugar cane and biting on it. He would always stress to me that in Trinidad they didn’t have slaves only indentured servants because that is what he learned in school. It seems that there is another education system that misinforms black people besides the U.S.

          As for your feeling intense pain, perhaps it is the racial memories. One of Trojan Pam’s books discusses racial memories. I think it’s Black Love is a Revolutionary Act (Trojan Pam, please correct me if I’m wrong) I went to this reading once and the person told me that I had ancestors protecting me. We are here because our ancestors were here at one point. There most likely is a connection between us and them but it remains to be unseen and of a supernatural nature.

          • TrojanPam says:

            @ kowaba

            you’re correct, the book is “Black Love”

            I also believe our ancestors are with us, watching us and when possible, protecting us.

            AND they are warning us about the dangers of allowing ourselves to be turned against each other, black male against black female, to bond with our enemies.

            If we are wise, we will listen.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ Sharon

          Racial memories are real and are passed along from generation to generation.

          People are more than flesh and blood. We are spirit beings and many intangible things that cannot be seen with the naked eye. We are not born with a blank slate.

          I go into more detail in my book, Black Love Is A Revolutionary Act.”

          I hope you’ll check it out. I think you’d find it very constructive.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ kowaba

      I think children WANT discipline and limits. It makes them feel safe.

      But when the parent is taking out their frustration on their children, that breeds fear, resentment, and sometimes, hatred.

      I agree, many parents are simply repeating what they learned, without thinking about it

      I still believe the way to teach our children is by EXAMPLE. That doesn’t mean you have to be perfect, but conducting yourself in an honest, ethical and respectful way goes a long way toward our children WANTING our respect.

      when you respect your parents, you don’t WANT to disappoint them. You want them to be proud of you and you want their approval

      Yet, too many folks do a TON of dirt in front of their children — lie, cheat, steal, con, act ugly, disrespect the mother or father of their children, and then sit back in surprise wondering why their children don’t listen to them

      BECAUSE they see who we are–and they don’t respect our (lack of) moral authority — because they see and hear what we do even when we think they’re aren’t listening or looking, and they KNOW when we are doing wrong because they’re smarter than we give them credit for.

      It is time to take a look at how we are raising our children, that’s all I’m saying

      • kowaba says:

        @ Trojan Pam

        I have to admit not until VERY recently have I realized that parenting by EXAMPLE has such a huge impact. My parents would say a bunch of stuff and not do it; as a child that is one of the most confusing things!!! You think well if it is good for me to do so why aren’t you doing it yourself. One example I can think of is my parents saying not to be lazy and to work hard; but their actions would show the opposite like waiting for other people to do a task they don’t “feel like doing” or just saying that they didn’t feel like doing something and that was a good enough reason not to. I can’t speak for other adults who have had parents that did not lead by example, but for myself, I’ve lost a lot of respect for my parents and have felt that I have had to develop healthy attitudes and habits on my own without the help of them. No worries though I’ve made progress and hope that I can help make a positive impact on the children that I deal with on a daily basis.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ kowaba

          I’m glad you were able to develop healthy attitudes despite your upbringing

          Parents are only fooling themselves when they think their children do not see who they really are — the good AND the bad.

          They are ALSO fooling themselves by telling themselves that their children’s behavior is not a REFLECTION of WHO they are as parents

          I’d like to share two quotes by a brilliant black author and social commentator, James Baldwin:
          —-
          “To accept one’s past – one’s history – is not the same thing as drowning in it; it is learning how to use it. An invented past can never be used; it cracks and crumbles under the pressures of life like clay in a season of drought.” — James Baldwin (1924-1987)

          “Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.” — James A. Baldwin

  19. […] Beating Black Children = A SLAVE TRADITION = Racism/White Supremacy. […]

  20. Gina HArris says:

    There is a WIDE line between Discipline and Abuse. People always want to refer to the bible verse Spare the Rod. However the bible does instruct to “beat them and they will not die” As a parent of 4 children and 6 grandchildren, and A teacher in a major city public school, people are crazy to think that discipline is not needed or warranted. Children have no idea what real life consequences are. We are so scared to parent and want to be our childrens friends. Wake up!! it is our responsibility to raise our children not baby them into some false sense of adulthood.Every body makes the team, Nobody recieves an F, They never learn to deal with hurt, disapppointment, denial. REALITY! If a parent cannot control their childs behavior then it is their lack as a parent and that is what the newspapers and judge will say when they are being charged with a horrible crime or the preacher will say it over their casket. I am so sick of people acting like “time out” is a means to correct behavior parents have taken a time out from parenting which is whjy the world has come undone.Do Not abuse your children! DICIPLINE THEM.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Gina HArris

      I agree with you on many of the points you made.

      Disciplining children is showing love. Abuse is NOT. I do NOT believe in beating children OR adults who misbehave.

      In my experience, parents who conduct themselves with integrity, who walk the talk, who do not lie, cheat, or steal in front of their children, AND spend quality time with their children, are more likely to have children that RESPECT them and WANT to please them.

      I have seen parents with VERY well disciplined and respectful children who have NEVER beat them.

      On the other hand, I have seldom met well-adjusted adults who were beaten on a regular basis as children.

      Every one of them seemed traumatized–no matter how well they tried to hide it–and often repeated the behaviors they experienced as children on their children.

      In my experience, the children with the WORST BEHAVIOR usually fall into one of three or more categories:

      1. Little to no discipline, which often goes hand in hand with some form of emotional neglect
      2. Abuse masked as “discipline”
      3. Other issues such as environment like family dysfunction, peer pressures, or sexual abuse

      There are so many reasons children misbehave:

      bad environment, poor diet, issues from lack of prenatal care or drug and alcohol issues that happen before and after the child is born, broken homes, dysfunctional relationships between parents, sexual abuse (that the parent may or may not know about), and parents that lack moral authority and/or have NO moral foundation —

      and for the life of me, I don’t see how BEATING them will “cure” those problems.

      I have also NEVER met a parent who admitted they were bad parents, so go figure…

      If you get to point where you have to BEAT your children, it is time to ask WHY, and the first person to ask might be the man or woman in the MIRROR.

      Just my opinion.

      • Phazex_Female says:

        One more. I see this often. A parent that neglects or forsakes their child or children “in favor” of another adult.

        At times, it IS disgusting. Go figure.

  21. LBM says:

    Many plantation owners here also had plantations in the Caribbean. Some northern slave owners who produced sugar products got the raw material (sugar cane) from their plantations in Cuba/the Caribbean. So there was some “switching out” of the enslaved. I’m not so aware of “ill behaved” slaves from here being sent to the Caribbean. What I do know is that the enslaved from the Caribbean came to be known as the most rebellious. In fact, after the Haitian Revolution South Carolina started the law that no enslaved folk from the Caribbean was to be brought to plantations here.

    Back to the discipline – again, I would want us to be so very compassionate of enslaved parents and 100 Years of Lynching parents and Jim Crow parents, etc. How petrified these people had to be every time their children left their presence. Imagine that many parents in Africa were already telling their children not to roam alone for fear of those working for/with the toobobs. Remember that the KIDnappings didn’t happen 1 time. The Atlantic Slave Trade was actually TradeS. This went on for centuries before the trading was supposedly abolished and the institution of breeding went into effect.

    My mind is racing, my heart heavy but as a parent I can imagine how petrified parents of those past times had to be. Little African girls were being savaged on those ships before they even arrived on these shores- some boys too. Black parents were aware from day one what the whites were capable of and willing to do to children. Many did resort to trying to “beat some sense” into the poor children who didn’t understand that they simply could not behave as children for long. It was an act of fearful love. Such is one of the many pathologies to come from that awful anti-human institution.

    Note: I do remember distinctly that while my southern grandfather (whom I adored) would tear that backside up, he never allowed us to be hit in the face/head. It was clear that “whuppins” were to discipline, not to humiliate.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ LBM

      Thanks for sharing constructive information–as usual

      My elders also believed in spanking, and sometimes used a switch, but like you said, they never called us dirty names, cursed us, or hit or slapped us in the face or the head or any place were damage could be done

      If a parent is hitting or beating their child and leaving bruises, scars, OR cursing them and calling them foul names or calling them stupid, black ass, ugly, nigger, nigga, etc. and/or, using objects that could inflict real damage, or slapping them in the face and head (which can cause brain damage)

      YOU ARE ABUSING YOUR CHILD– POINT BLANK PERIOD.

      From what I have seen when a parent’s VIOLENCE rises to these levels, many times it is NOT about the child–but about that parent’s rage/frustration at life in general, or about a situation or a person who is probably not in the room. Or they may be revisiting their own violent upbringing on their children.

      And that is something that needs to be addressed.

  22. Mega says:

    This is very insightful discussion, however there are other races and cultures that discipline their children using physical means like spanking or beating. While there is some truth to this, I would ask for the reasoning behind other cultures like Russian, Asian, etc. who also do this, but were not exposed to chattel slavery in the same capacity. Also, Latinos to a far lesser extent, but also still engage in this behavior. Food for thought.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Mega

      This post is NOT about child abuse in general, it is about the CONNECTION between slavery and the way the descendants of slavery are REPEATING behaviors (slave traditions) learned during slavery.

      I am NOT Russian or Asian, so I am not qualified to tackle that subject.

      You could check out blogs by Asian and Russian bloggers and post this question.

  23. pam says:

    Really people! Every nationality spanks their kids. The only difference between us disciplining our children and other races is we only spank on bottoms, others would punch and slap their kids in the face. Does every aspects of our loves have to be based on slavery. We cant let go of the past. Yes it happened but we should focus more on how to make a better future not let the past keep us from moving forward. We dont have to forget it but my god, start talking about how to make a mark on future history and that our kids can be proud of us. Martin Luther died in vain. I’m ashamed.Black people pulling the racism card. I’m black and my only goal is to make sure my daughter become successful, proud to be black and make her mark in the world. To represent black people in a positive light!

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ pam

      As some wise person once said: “A people who do not know their history are doomed to repeat it.”

      I would add: “A people who want to FORGET their history will definitely repeat it.”

      That’s why you won’t hear the Jews (who control a TON more stuff than black people do) telling their children OR telling other Jews:

      “We can’t let go of the past. Yes it happened but we should focus more on how to make a better future not let the past keep us from moving forward.”

      If they had let go of the past, they wouldn’t have received a DIME of the BILLIONS OF DOLLARS in reparations after the Jewish Holocaust OR a piece of Palestinian land.

      One thing I learned after years of blogging is:

      You cannot reach everyone
      You cannot teach everyone
      You cannot persuade everyone
      You cannot even convince everyone (that fat meat is greasy)
      NOR SHOULD YOU TRY

      I also learned not to worry about those who don’t “get it” — and to focus on those who DO

      However, you saying “I’m ashamed” and “playing the racism card” casts some suspicion on your ethnicity, but I’ll leave that alone (because I have no way of knowing nor do I care).

      Be you black OR white, if you don’t think this blog constructive, hopefully, you’ll find another blog more to your liking.

      • lol and the person said mlk. idk why whites and whitewashed blacks use mlk all the dang time it’s so predictable. They act as if mlk was the only one that died or sacrificed his life for the greater good, but I guess they love using him because they just focus on the judging ppl by the content of their character and not the color of their skin quote, but they forget all the other stuff he said. smh. Rofl then she said pulling the racism card, bahwah um no this is the we gotta change how we are handling things and can’t keep doing what we’ve been doing for generations since slavery card.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ mstoogood4yall

          It’s funny how Dr. King’s name just rolls off the tongue AFTER his death but he was certainly demonized while alive.

          Not surprisingly, Malcolm X’s name is seldom spoken with such reverence–even by many blacks.

      • LBM says:

        FORGET WHAT???

        BERLIN — A German court says a 92-year-old former member of the Nazis’ Waffen SS will go on trial in September on allegations he executed a Dutch resistance fighter in 1944.
        Dutch-born Siert Bruins, who is now German, already served time in Germany in the 1980s for the wartime murder of two Dutch Jews.

        BUDAPEST, Hungary (AP) — A 97-year-old Hungarian man suspected of abusing Jews and helping deport thousands of them during the Holocaust was taken into custody Wednesday, questioned and charged with war crimes, prosecutors said.
        The case of Laszlo Csatary was brought to the attention of Hungarian authorities last year by the Simon Wiesenthal Center, a Jewish organization active in hunting down Nazis who have yet to be brought to justice.
        ——————————————–
        Meanwhile, what were jewish folk doing in other parts of the world from 1933-44? What kinds of movies was jewish owned MGM producing at the time…..”I don no nuthin’ ’bout birthin no babies”

      • Shaunart says:

        Fabulous response Trojan. I am inspired by your approach…and need to get your books.

  24. Jacintha R. Brice says:

    Interesting discussion.I agree with the statement “Racism is White Supremacy” and with most of the conclusion that behavior that had its purposes for survival under slavery (but was not necessarily the most effective) is handed down knowingly and unknowingly to this and, if we do not act, to next generations.

    But….

    I disagree with the motivation given for e.g. beating the children or verbal abuse under slavery. That this was done, as said in one of the other posts, to protect children from further punishment or out of love is something I really doubt. Under slavery there is no love; it is every one for him and her self. That is the curse paid forward to every next generation. In any other society it would have been tackled but not in the White Supremacy Society a.k.a. the USA where blacks are forced in a role still inferior to whites which prevents them from engaging in meaningful dialogue.

    Mostly we have to guess what our ancestors felt and thought while being enslaved. Slavery created blank pages in our history, holes in our identity, and perversion in our morality. The picture as it exists now is necessarily an adaptation to the white man’s history, identity, and morality because we did not have anything else. That picture is too sweet, because nothing is more gruesome than violence in a moral and emotional void in which monsters are easily created.

    We are doing a pretty good job controlling the monsters that were handed down to us, especially since we are still living in a society that did not and does not assume responsibility for what it did and does to us. The goal, however, should not be to control the monsters, but to get rid of them.

    Primordial to that task is a discussion in which no question is ruled out. Especially not the questions that ask us to face the things we want to hide from others and ourselves, because there we might – and I think we will – find the answers that will set us free from the past because we will have our past defined on our terms and it will make us less vulnerable to manipulation by the racist society we live in. This blog serves that purpose.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Jacintha R. Brice

      Fortunately, we don’t have to guess. There are slave journals available on the internet, which include written and verbal testimonies by slaves.

      Slaves were human–regardless of their tragic circumstances–and certainly felt human emotions like any other human beings. In many respects, there were MORE HUMANE toward each other than many black people are toward other black people today.

      To think that slaves didn’t love or care about each other is to accept and internalize a DEGRADED IMAGE of ourselves as less than human.

      Slaves were FULLY HUMAN who possessed the full range of emotions that anyone else experienced.

      As LBM said in a post following yours, slaves often tried to protect each other and some died trying. Some male slaves tried to stop slave-owners from raping their women and children and often paid for it with their lives. Some slave women killed their babies so they wouldn’t be subjected to a lifetime of brutal slavery. There were HUNDREDS of slave uprisings where slaves attacked slave-owners, chopped them up with axes, and poisoned their food and livestock. Many slave-owners lived in a constant fear of their lives.

      Unfortunately, many black folks get their “history” from Hollywood movies like “Lincoln” (which falsely portrayed slaves as being passive), and “The Butler” and “Dejango” — aka the VERSION white filmmakers WANT us to believe.

      This is how white supremacy programming becomes INTERNALIZED in the minds of many black people, who accept the (false) WHITE interpretation of our history AND the lack of humanity of black people in general.

      I would strongly suggest you read some of the slave journals.

  25. LBM says:

    “Under slavery there is no love; it is every one for him and her self.”

    Does that comment suggest that enslaved mothers had no problem with their children being sold away? Or that enslaved mothers didn’t “coach” young girls on how to be raped – as Joy Degruy speaks about – to lessen the violence of it? Does it mean that upon emancipation Black people didn’t search for “loved ones” in neighboring and far off counties as many historical accounts have told us?

    “Mostly we have to guess what our ancestors felt and thought while being enslaved. Slavery created blank pages in our history, holes in our identity,….”

    Plantation slavery (by law:() ended less than 150 years ago. In addition to the many slave narratives in print and a few on tape, indeed we have elder folk still alive today who knew foreparents who were slaves. I’m not even 50 years old and I knew my great-greatgrandmother who was enslaved. She was a girl when “emancipation came” and lived well over a century. And I’m not unique especially given the fact that it’s not like plantation slavery truly ended in 1865 on the dot, hence

    My point is, let’s not perpetuate the misinformation that plantation slavery was sooooo long ago. It was not and it’s effects are still being felt. Many whites are still reaping family and corporate wealth derived from slavery. And Blacks are still reaping the poverty from it.

    And let’s not forget that we were still enslaved for a longer period than we’ve been “free”.

    • Jacintha R. Brice says:

      @ LBM No, want I meant to say, is that love is a scarce commodity under slavery and I’m not only referring to romantic love. Slavery induced permanent stress for long periods of time making people switch to survival mode and definitely becoming less than human in their actions, thoughts, and even dreams. The examples you give certainly proof my point.

      Lucky you are to have knowledge of your family histories. I’m from the Caribbean and none of my great-grandmothers (and fathers even less) ever spoke to anybody about their experience (slavery was officially abolished in 1863 here.) There still is a huge taboo. Small societies, vulnerabilities and the conformity to the norms of white society.

      So, the gaps are real and cannot be filled easily by stories of others. And white society encourages to use cliche stories because then they can be easily refuted as untrue “because all those stories sound the same”.

      All of this not to diminish the role and effects of our slavery past. It is a long way to emancipation especially in a society in which wealth is still unequally divided on the base of race.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ LBM

      Thanks for posting another constructive and informative comment.

      You’re absolutely correct, after slavery (supposedly) ended, former slaves traveled hundreds of miles trying to find their relatives sold to other plantations.

      Right after slavery, former slaves started businesses, ran for office, and created over 50 all-black towns in Oklahoma, the most famous was Tulsa — Black Wall Street — something a lot of black people never heard of.

      Unfortunately, many blacks (whose ancestors were slaves) regard slavery AND slaves with a barely disguised contempt– all a BYPRODUCT of white supremacy programming, white MIS-identification, and a LACK OF KNOWLEDGE of our true history.

      We need to stop running from our past, and learn to embrace it. There are many lessons we could learn.

  26. Duyyyyy says:

    Well this was stupid

  27. Mariama says:

    @Pam:

    Like always, you deliver when it comes to thought-provoking and soul-searching posts for our people. This post left me with a heavy heart because it opens old wounds and it pains me to know that our children are being abused and mistreated. In my eyes, black children (African, Carribean,Afro-American) are the most precious gifts we have. What greatly irritates and angers me is the denial that continues to take place in these communities when the writing is clearly on the wall. There is so much healing that needs to take place. I can’t even imagine what our ancestors endured.

    Another thing: how in the world do racist whites pretending to be black come in these discussions? To me, that is extremely intrusive and disrespectful. I have almost been fooled by some of these posts, but then I began to see a pattern in the way that they write. How do they find this site in particular. It is funny that they never comment once you give them a good dose of some bitter medicine. I just have to say that I feel as if our space is being invaded. This is the one place that I can come and discuss serious issues pertaining to our folks and our conversation is being rudely interrupted. Is there any way you can screen these folks? Just sayin…

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Mariama

      the level of delusion and denial among the black/African population is disturbing and frustrating. But we have to keep planting seeds and food for thought. Those that get it, will get it. Those who don’t, won’t.

      Interference is to be expected in a system of white supremacy.

  28. mobo says:

    What about the African culture that considers beating and other forms of punishment as a way to discipline children? I am African and what you see in your culture (America and the black population) is just a tip of what I grew up on. I would be glad to have gotten that as a form of discipline. It has been before slavery. Beating has been in us like it has been in other cultures like in Asia….. You need to research more into your topic. Or spend a week walking the streets of Africa, you’ll see where it rooted from. This discipline or abuse or whatever you call it followed us here just like our complexion, music and other forms of our tradition/cultures and it has been watered down/ modified or taken away like other parts of our culture.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ mobo

      Africa were colonized by Europeans. That means the same damage done to blacks in the U.S, also happened in many parts of Africa.

      • LBM says:

        Absolutely Pam. Additionally, prior to that, many of our African males willingly procreated with european females and we don’t even want to get started with some of the damage/abusers that produced.

        I have been to a few African countries. I didn’t see/hear of children being “beatdown abused” but many of the girls are sexually abused by old coots and many of the sistas are gettting their asses whupped on the regular – domestic abuse, worse than here. So I wouldn’t doubt as MOBO said that children are being abused as well. I guess I would be classified as “afrocentric” but I’m in no way an African romanticist. The white anti-human disease effects all of us Africans, across the globe.

        On a parallel note, the issue of grown males taking out their frustrations of impotence on our children is indeed a problem. We’re seeing this especially with ex-cons and the children of the women into whose homes they are released. I’m a passionate student of plantation life and the pathologies that continue to plague us – but I have zero compassion for the predatory males that have abandoned all sense of history and community and have been attacking black women and children and men as well.

        I’m happy to be able to participate in this topic, it’s VERY important, but I do want to be clear that in no way do I endorse the caveman (& female) disguised as black savagery against our young people. It’s appalling and many of these “grown folk” do need parenting classes to understand the difference between discipline and misplaced aggression. Black mothers need classes to understand how to protect the environments around their children. Dang, even enslaved mothers TRIED. Now we have females letting all sorts of animals have access to children, tryna be “the man” of somebody elses house.

        Sorry for the rant but I feel we need to do a whole lot better by our children and while I do believe our foremothers and fathers may have gone a bit far sometimes – I do believe it was out of LOVE, fearful love, but love nonetheless. While the abuse today is not about love. IMO.

        • Mariama says:

          @LBM:

          As the mother of a little girl, I co-sign your post 100%. What too many parents do not realize is that they have to sacrifice their selfish needs for the needs of their children. As a mother, it boggles my mind how a mother and father can allow psychopathic significant others to come into their homes and abuse and mistreat their children. It is really tragic.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ LBM

          I agree, we need a MAJOR discussion about black male/black female relationships (Gender Wars), child abuse/neglect, attempted sexism, and many other issues.

          The point I want to make CLEAR is I’m not saying everything that’s wrong with black people is the fault of white people.

          HOWEVER, when you BRUTALIZE and DEHUMANIZE a group of people FOR OVER 400 YEARS PLUS ANOTHER HUNDRED-PLUS YEARS OF SEGREGATION AND MODERN DAY RACISM — how do you separate that DAMAGE from whatever else they might be or could have been–good OR bad?

          YOU CAN’T

          Anymore than you can BRUTALIZE and DEHUMANIZE a child from INFANCY UNTIL THE AGE OF 21 — then try to SEPARATE whatever else that child might be OR could have been from the DAMAGE that was done over a 21-year period. You can’t do it. We don’t have compartments for our experiences in life — ALL our experiences COMBINE to make us who we are.

          Some people think I’m saying black people are brainless victims who are not responsible for anything we do.

          That is far from what I’m saying — and I’m not addressing to you personally, but I needed to say it.

          What would African people in America, the Carribbean, and Africa BE if white supremacy never existed?

          I can’t answer that. Maybe, we would be GLOBAL SUPER STARS in architecture, finance, and the arts and maybe not–but I do KNOW we wouldn’t be hating and harming each other simply because of the color of our skin. We wouldn’t hate our hair and skin so much we would CHEMICALLY MUTILATE and risk major health issues in the process. We wouldn’t look at our children or our sisters and brothers and spouses and lovers as DEFECTIVE JUST FOR BEING BORN BLACK. And we wouldn’t be suffering from self-esteem issues that guarantee failure. That, I do know.

          Re the lack of parenting skills, when you don’t know better and haven’t been taught better, you probably won’t do better. Enslaved mothers, as horrible as their circumstances were, had a COMMUNITY made up of other slaves and they learned how to parent as best they could from the people they were around.

          Many parents today were not raised in a community, and many received NO instruction other than imitating the dysfunction they grew up around. The toxic food, water, air, and environment, anti-black, immoral entertainment coupled with poverty, inferior schools, gang and drug-infested areas, sexual abuse and assault, and seeing a lot of violence and death among other young black people has had a devastating effect on the minds of some black people. Some of our children have post traumatic stress syndrome that will NEVER be treated—yet we throw the biggest stones we can find at them because they have the NERVE not to live up to our “expectations.”

          So many black females — deprived of fathers who NEVER validated their worth as “daddy girls” aka females worthy of protection and respect, have a lack positive male role models, and many have been sexually assaulted by the time they turn 13, never get the help or counseling they need AND now are so desperate for male attention and affection (VALIDATION) that they wind up having sex and babies with the wrong people under the wrong circumstances.

          Like Dr. Welsing said, when you don’t get that “lap time” from your parents, you will seek affection and attention anyway you can get it–and SEX is the most common way emotionally deprived males and females get that attention or affection.

          We must find ways to address their problems without throwing stones and devastating what’s left of their self-esteem.

          (of course, I’m not speaking about all black youth or black people)

          That is what I hope this post will do–is to provide food for thought AND constructive change

  29. las says:

    i want to address the “spare the rod spoil the child” reference in the article. The rod referred to in the Bible is representative of discipline. it does not have to be physical contact. It simply means to discipline your kids.Depending on your child, discipline could be taking away activities and things they like, placing them in time out, adding chores etc. As many have said, there’s nothing wrong with a pop on the butt or hand as i often got growing up but beating with spoons extension cords and popping kids in the face is out of order.

  30. tee says:

    Well I began to ask myself questions about this very issue while watching the movie 12 Years A Slave and saw how whippings were used to control the slaves, as well as other forms of abuse too. Sometimes the slave owner would force the other slaves to administer the whippings and of course they were done with in view of everyone on the plantation. I could see how the ‘tradition’ of violence as a means of control has continued throughout our existence here and questioned how we use whippings to control our children. Whether you call them whippings or spanking, whether it’s having a shoe or objects thrown at you (that happened in the movie too) it’s still violence used to control behavior and maybe it is time to rethink that ‘tradition’ at least in our community.
    There are ways to discipline children without the violence and they may be more effective than what has been used so far. I got spankings as a child and hated them. Verbal ‘spankings’ were very common–I cannot tell you how many times I was called stupid and all it did was lower my self-esteem. My parents passed on what they learned from their parents so I’m speaking from experience. All this post is doing is inviting folks to think about the reasons why we do what we do and work to maybe find a better solution.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ tee

      Thank you, this post was written to provoke conversation and thought — NOT to say that black people are the only ones who abuse our children (?)

      The things we say to our children stay with them for a LIFETIME. The things we think are small and insignificant, like telling a child “you’ll never amount to anything” last a LIFETIME.

      I had a male about 50 years old repeat something his father said when he was ten years old and I could tell it had devastated his self-esteem and it still HURT– 40 years later.

      WORDS ARE WEAPONS — and for black children, they can be especially deadly when the rest of society mirrors that contempt.

      what I’m saying is — if you want to BULLY someone, find someone your OWN SIZE or BIGGER — and get ready to take your lumps

    • Sharon says:

      Tee: In response to your comment about how the slave owner would force other slaves to administer beatings and this was done in view of everyone on the plantation. My dad passed a story down to us stating that after the slaves had been worked nearly to death during the day, they would still sometimes be beaten at night for no reason at all. And when the men were beaten or killed, the women and children were forced to watch and they would especially make sure that the women who were pregnant watch this brutality. He stated this was done to make sure we were so damaged that we passed it on from one generation to the other, because even if the woman was pregnant, this was still passed on to her unborn child. Sadly, after the Emancipation Proclamation, there were no professionals around to help deprogram us so this madness has been passed down. Even the slave-master (especially the slave-master) needed to be deprogrammed because what was done to African slaves was the worst kind of slavery and it is still embroiled in American soil as apple pie. Sometimes I question whether these people are even human.

  31. martin andrews says:

    once the aliens from outer space invade then whites and blacks will fight together as one people. “ET GO HOME!” – blacks n whites. Love each other : )

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ martin andrews

      If that “fighting aliens” scenario ever happened it would have the same outcome for black people that occurred AFTER blacks fought in American Revolutionary War, Civil War, WW 1, WW 2, Vietnam, the Korean War, the Gulf War, the Iraq War, or the war in Afghanistan —

      RACISM/WHITE SUPREMACY

      Because RACISM/WHITE SUPREMACY created ALL the wars I listed above.

      • martin andrews says:

        white or black, i think ET would go down in the first round. Team Humans! Unity as one, stand together.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ martin andrews

          As I explained being a VICTIM does not mean you are not accountable. If I came up behind you and knocked you in the head with a hammer, would you think I victimized you? Or would your “moxie” prevent this from happening?

          Looking forward to hearing your response.

  32. LBM says:

    Sub-human at best, anti-human for sure. I recently read another document on the torture tactics of the Church. I had a professor back in the day who taught us that we’d have to study european history – how they did each other – to understand how they could do what they did/do to us. Engaging in that study led me to being clear that they are not human in the way we are. Do a quick search on some of those torture tactics. Do another on the pictures of the creatures, children included, who stood around laughing and joking and claiming body parts as humans roasted while hanging. What human can do that shyt???

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ LBM

      We definitely have a different nature. There are things I could not imagine black people doing that whites have done to us, like:

      * spitting on white children and calling them foul names as they walked to school
      * getting the neighbors together — all adults — to burn crosses on people’s lawns
      * eating food at a picnic with our children, laughing and pointing as a white person swung from a tree or was burned alive
      * showing pictures of starving white babies to black men and women at work and making jokes about it
      * making jokes about an unarmed white teenaged boy who was shot down in cold blood by a black “neighborhood watch man”

      Any of the above, try doing ANY of the above around other black people and you will be OSTRACIZED IMMEDIATELY and seen as a wicked person who should be avoided at all costs

      you get the picture

  33. Keisha Murray says:

    This is the most ridiculous topic I have ever heard. Abusing and beating your child is a CHOICE, even if you grew up in a home that you were an abused child. I am a psychologist. To say that it somehow has been “imprinted” in a person’s psyche is such an absurd thought, especially 400 years later. Try accountability….start taking OWNERSHIP of your own actions, stop blaming others, no matter what the color. Its time we MAN UP and start correcting our wrongs and STOP blaming those who have not direct influence on us, other than what WE allow.

    • martin andrews says:

      Well said. Easier to be the victim Accountability takes moxie. Love is the goal.

      • Phazex_Female says:

        Easier to victimize too, huh? But I guess accountability for White Supremacy is harder, eh?

        Do us a favor? Stick to your own racist sites, okay?

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Keisha Murray

      No disrespect intended, but if you’re a pyschologist, I pity your patients.

      • LBM says:

        I have to agree Pam.

        And Ms Keisha, it’s not 400 years later. This is discussed in a post somewhere above. Have you read Dr. Joy Degruy or Naim Akbar, Wade Nobles, Bobby Wright? What about medical-degreed Psychiatrist Dr. Francis Cress Welsing? What do you think about their psychological analysis of slave culture as it relates to present pathologies?

        Your contribution here is why so many black folk are wary of seeking mental health therapy.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ LBM

          A little knowledge is a dangerous thing — and there is NO worse combination than ignorance and arrogance.

          Any “psychologist” worth his or her salt would NEVER so casually (and callously) dismiss the effects of GENERATIONAL damage on any population.

          Nor would any competent psychologist be unaware of the numerous theories by respected psychiatrists and psychologists about RACIAL MEMORIES and GENERATIONAL post traumatic stress syndromes, like the following:

          Post Traumatic Stress Disorders Can Affect The Offspring Of The Survivors

          According to an article by the American Academy of Experts in Traumatic Stress (AAETS), http://www.aaets.org, the emotional wounds of Jewish Holocaust survivors may have seeped into the psyches of many of their children.

          The article also stated that the children of Holocaust survivors were at greater risk for depression, anxiety, and PTSD symptoms because of their exposure to their traumatized parents.

          Another study in 1998 found that the children of Holocaust survivors reported “Holocaust-related thoughts and images as their primary traumas.”

          LBM, how can a people whose ORIGINAL IDENTITY was stolen and replaced with a FALSE, DEGRADED IDENTITY that labeled us as inferior– AND who carry the NAMES of their former slave-owners NOT carry generational damage?

          And how can Jewish descendants of the Holocaust be damaged by their parents 12-YEAR ORDEAL but the descendants of 400 YEARS OF SLAVERY not be damaged?

          That just doesn’t make sense.

          That’s the reason I dropped my Psych major in college. I didn’t understand how I could help black people by learning about Freud (a cocaine addict with sexual delusions)

          and NEVER read ONE WORD about the effects of racism on its victims OR the psychological ILLNESS of (white) people who were driven to practice it.

          How could I help someone else when I couldn’t help myself?

          The Black Nation desperately needs mental health experts, but not those who think black people — in the face of relentless racism — should just “be accountable.”

          That’s why I would NEVER, EVER recommend “counseling” for any black person by a black psychologist who does NOT have an understanding of racism/white supremacy.

          Because more than likely, they are being treated by someone in desperate need of counseling THEMSELVES.

      • mstoogood4yall says:

        yeah I feel bad for the patients too lol. experts and people with degrees don’t know everything and a lot of times don’t have common sense. People contradict themselves, if they can point out that kids who have parents that are overweight are more likely to be overweight themselves then why can’t they also see that kids that are abused will more than likely be abusive. It is like when people say I will not be like my parents I won’t do what they did, then they end up being just like their parents and making the same mistakes, because it is what they’ve learned. parents are the first teachers of a child so if they are abusive their kids will probably grow up and be abusive too. People can break the cycle but it is hard and if parents weren’t strong enough to break that cycle don’t be disappointed and angry that ur child was not strong enough to break the cycle because u did not equip them with the right tools/teachings to get the job done. It all goes in cycles and people learn how to act by the example their parents set. I watched an episode of iylana fix my life and all the females had been sexually abused and told they were lying and what did they do? they did it to each other, the oldest sister was sexually abused and was told she was making it up, then she raised her younger sister and her younger sister was abused by the oldest sister’s boyfriend and was told she was making it up. When parents don’t give their kids the tools to be the best they can then people need an intervention they need someone to point out the dysfunction and teach them how to replace that behavior with a positive one.

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ mstoogood4yall

          How can a trained psychologist NOT be aware of at least some of the psychological studies on inherited phobias, racial memories, and mental illnesses?

          A lot of educated blacks are programmed to see black people via white eyes by the time they graduate from mainstream universities. That may be one reason why so many wind up dating and marrying whites after they graduate.

          And I have found in my own family–that there is often a disconnect between educated blacks and blacks THEY perceive as uneducated or poor (meaning, less intelligent).

          And I have also found that common sense and education don’t always go hand in hand.

          I think education is a beautiful thing — but NOT if it makes you look down on those who have less.

          And the irony is, many educated blacks are finding themselves in the same leaky economic boats as those with less education.

          Hopefully, this will wake some of them up to the realization that in a white supremacy system an educated black is still BLACK.

      • Sharon says:

        TrojanPam, I pity Keisha’s patients also. Not sure where she got her training but looks like people all over the world agree that mental and emotional issues can be passed on just like the physical scars. Over the years, I have seen many articles on this subject. Take a look at another article among the many articles on this topic: http://naturallymoi.com/2013/12/news/depression-can-be-transmitted-from-mother-to-babies-in-the-womb/

        • TrojanPam says:

          @ Sharon

          I don’t believe people are born with a blank psychological slate. We’re not born with blank faces or bodies with no shape or color. We INHERIT most of what we start out with. If we believe we are spiritual beings, and are born with a “spirit” then how do we know what that “spirit” contains? Maybe, it contains the trauma, experiences, and memories of our ancestors.

          Who knows?

      • Epi says:

        I agree and me my “troll alert” is blinking…can’t stay out of OUR business can they? smh…

    • Phazex_Female says:

      @ Keisha:

      Where did you obtain your degree? At Mickey D’s?

      Moreover, to state that White Supremacy has not had a profound impact on the psyche of many black people in this country and globally, is not only an out and out LIE, but white-trained ndividuals such as YOU are definitely “MISeducated,” especially if you are a “sister” though I doubt that.

      Spirit help you.

  34. eriktrips says:

    Thanks for writing this. I am also a survivor of abuse, but overwhelmingly of European descent (German, English–can’t get much whiter), and I think your analysis is spot on. I find it a little odd to hear white people saying that because they too were abused your point is somehow refuted. It is true I am sort of obsessed with the question of just how fundamental abuse might be to Euro-American white culture (my hypothesis is More Than We Are Willing To Admit), but I would think it clear that the existence of abuse in the colonial culture does not call into question the idea that the same culture transmitted its expertise in abuse to the populations it colonized and/or enslaved.

    The geneaologies of abuse within and across cultures are bound to be complex at this point, I think, but abuse itself is like some extremely well-adapted virus: it spreads through whatever avenues it can and it disrupts social bonds at every level and scale. Our histories may be different, but they are implicated in one another and have been for some time.

    But you and your commenters are doing the hard work of raising the initial critique: how better to intervene than to begin to talk as honestly as possible about what happened, what still happens, and what needs to happen to reinstate compassion where violence has become the much easier go-to strategy for keeping “order”? I cannot comment on what goes on in your communities, but we white folks are so good at exercising power through violent coercion that many of us cannot even recognize it for what it is. Which I suspect is not news to you.

    So thanks for doing this hard work. I don’t know what sort of denial you find yourself up against, but it has practically concretized into WorldWarFive-proof bunkers where I come from. I said it was odd to read some of the comments, but they don’t surprise me, really. So much easier to wave hands and refuse to listen than to risk learning about ones’ self from what someone else has to say. And safer, in some sadly twisted ways.

    I hope you don’t mind if I read you for the next little while.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ eriktrips

      Thanks for sharing your insights.

      What is disturbing are the last two comments (from martin andrews and Keisha Murray) who– if they are black (which may or may not be the case) think it is “ridiculous” to talk about the damage done by 400 years of slavery to African people.

      If they are black (and I pray they are not) their obvious anti-blackness and callousness (as evidenced in their comments) is MORE PROOF of the damage I’m speaking of, and possibly a revelation about their own childhood where compassion for others was clearly not taught–and perhaps, not given (to them).

      Could you imagine Jews telling other Jews to forget about their Holocaust–something that happened over a 12-year period? Or white people, who spend MILLIONS of dollars studying and treating the effects of Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome on white people who have experienced ONE traumatic event–like the Columbine shooting–telling other TRAUMATIZED white people to “just get over it?”

      Yet, there are black people who think (after 400 years of chattel slavery and 150 years of systematic racism) that discussing the effects of SLAVERY is a “ridiculous” topic.

      Sad, indeed.


      Here’s an excerpt from the book, “Black Love Is A Revolutionary Act”

      EXCERPT 1

      Post Traumatic Stress Disorders Can Affect The Offspring Of The Survivors

      According to an article by the American Academy of Experts in Traumatic Stress (AAETS), http://www.aaets.org, the emotional wounds of Jewish Holocaust survivors may have “seeped into the psyches of many of their children.”

      The article also stated that the children of Holocaust survivors were at greater risk for depression, anxiety, and PTSD symptoms because of their exposure to their traumatized parents. Another study in 1998 found that the children of Holocaust survivors reported “Holocaust-related thoughts and images as their primary traumas.”

      The total lack of interest by the mainstream media, law enforcement, and the white collective in general in the almost daily murders of black children in America may explain their callous dismissal of the “Post Traumatic Slavery Syndrome” (PTSS), and why this term cannot be found in any Webster’s dictionary.

      In this chapter, the authors will attempt to do what the mainstream media, the medical/psychiatric communities, and the guardians of Webster’s dictionary refuse to do: acknowledge the Post Traumatic Slavery Syndrome as a LEGITIMATE DISORDER, and demonstrate how PTSS is the SINGLE BIGGEST CAUSE of BLACK GENDER WARS between the black male and female.

      EXCERPT #2

      “We are still slaves. The chains are inside us now. They turn our spirits mean, our hearts into metallic chambers…They render our memories empty, our vision short, our song coarse, our fathers broken, our mothers bereaved.” — Randall Robinson, author of ‘The Reckoning.”

      END OF EXCERPTS

      Regardless, it’s to be expected, that so many blacks are so contemptuous of other black people, while offering NOTHING in opposition to the white people who are dominating and oppressing them — and in fact, would probably deny they were victims of racism at all.

      A black person opposing white supremacy/domination takes REAL “moxie” (and GUTS). A black person talking bad about other black people takes NONE.

      It will be interesting to see the shock of these white-identified, anti-black blacks in the coming days of greater economic decline who think (other) blacks should pull themselves up by their emotional bootstraps…

      Regardless, I will continue sharing information and providing food for thought. And I sincerely hope those who find this topic unnecessary or ridiculous will find a more constructive use for their time.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ eriktrips

      I meant to address this in my first reply to you.

      Your statement — ” It is true I am sort of obsessed with the question of just how fundamental abuse might be to Euro-American white culture (my hypothesis is More Than We Are Willing To Admit), but I would think it clear that the existence of abuse in the colonial culture does not call into question the idea that the same culture transmitted its expertise in abuse to the populations it colonized and/or enslaved.”

      I have never considered this, and I have to say this is a truly profound observation, and one I think sheds a lot of light on this subject.

      Of course, you are welcome to check out my blog.

  35. […] Beating Black Children = A SLAVE TRADITION = Racism/White Supremacy (racismws.com) […]

  36. […] Beating Black Children = A SLAVE TRADITION = Racism/White Supremacy […]

  37. Where did you find the black women feeding the white baby. What site I go on to find out what year was this picture taken where did she live and what was her name? Very interested to know.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Deborah

      I’m not sure where I found it but here’s some info and a link I found re the picture:

      “The image in question is part of a French postcard line depicting scenes and people in the Ottoman Empire around 1910. Slavery was still illicitly practiced in some parts of the Ottoman Empire at this time, but on the decline. So while it is unlikely that this photo is of a slave, it is possible.

      Here’s the original citation:

      Type de « négresse » d’Adana Nourrice noire allaitante éditions G. Mizrahi, Adana, carte postale, 9 x 14, vers 1910

      Most of this information is visible on the original, un-cropped postcard:

  38. […] Beating Black Children = A SLAVE TRADITION = Racism/White Supremacy (racismws.com) […]

  39. malachi says:

    without branching off of the topic(cause there are too many slave tendencies to count) beating/abusing a child only builds up resentment and anger and never gives a child the lessons of right, wrong ,thinking, consequences etc..i know that grom my childhood experience as well as parenting..the best way to move our people into a different direction is to treat our children as well as other children as they are “our future”

  40. ZerosAndOnes says:

    It’s nice to see I’m not the only one who realizes the connections between slavery/European Assimilation of darker people of the planet. I grew up with whippings (yeah, yeah the whole go out and pick your own ‘switch’ to be beaten with, extension cords, belts, etc). What amazes me is how the world has changed, but my fellow browns in America still are sooooooooooo unaware of their behavior (especially in public). The ones who ARE aware explain it away with words and phrases like ‘discipline’ or ‘spare the rod’. Then these parents who think they’ve made it out turn around and become flabbergasted when that same child grows up to beat their wives and kids or marry a guy who beats them. It is quite a confusing message to send: the parent hand that beats you claims to love you and do it for your own good. That is exactly what an abusive mother or husband says after a beating! Violence teaches violence.

    And this other blindspot with my fellow browns: Christianity. All my life (a few decades), I’ve heard about what the white man took from us, what the white man did to us. But they jump up and defend the master’s religion. Not once did I hear that the white man took our religion. Our past was erased, including our original religions. But blacks in America are soooo assimilated that they jump to defend this, even showing gratitude that the master led them away from ‘primitive’ beliefs into Christianity!!! I’d be lucky (and grateful) if a blood test could identify exactly where I came from. I know my native American tribe and my white origins more than I know about my African origins. That is sad. Even blacks can’t see the extent of the damage in their behavior. If I ask religious black people what the council of Nicea did, most would go ‘who?’. They don’t know how the bible was compiled, what was left out, what was misinterpreted (for example people read in some bibles about the end of the world. World was supposed to say ‘age’ or ‘aeon’. It was actually talking about transitioning from the age of Pisces -Jesus’ time’ – into the next age, which is Aquarius. Note the comment about the man/statue with the ‘pitcher’ in Luke 22:10). And when it comes to religious gay ranting, I have to wonder if the only reason why they’re not republicans is the pro slavery/racism of the party! But many churches keep control of people with fear, repeatedly enforcing imagery of monsters, demons, and destruction instead of a transition into a new time. It sure doesn’t help people with mental illnesses (which I think slavery, segregation, discrimination, and assimilation helps to create).

    I think the internet was a type of 2nd coming, in a way, because people can’t be controlled by the mental vice installed by church leaders anymore. We can talk to each other freely now, all over the world. We can reason. We can be honest in talking about our past and present. We can find support at places like exchristian.net (exMormon or exJW). We can free our minds. People are taking their brains back and feeling alive again. I think the struggle right now is reaching another peak. It’s Progress verses people who cling to ancient, misinterpreted books, keeping them in the Dark Ages.

    I think conservatives can expect to win maybe one more election in the States. They’re fighting hard now to keep control of people they think are ‘beneath’ them (us heathens, infidels, LGBT, poor, women, mentally ill, even disabled people)…. as seen with their fierce efforts to redraw district maps to win elections, voter ID changes, cuts to needed programs, etc Everyone, of all colors, should read about civil asset forfeiture abuse and laws that gradually took away personal rights (google Sarah Stillman and Civil Asset Forfeiture to learn how it ‘works’). Liberals and conservatives could end up either separating so everyone can be happy. Or conservatives will keep losing members and elections and end up changing their tune like hypocrites. I think people of all colors are fed up with being told that those of us who struggle should pay 26% in taxes, while people with no financial struggles get to pay less than half of that! I think people are getting fed up with religious intolerance (and domination), and all inequalities (it’s weak and wrong to use one’s religion to keep other people as 2nd class……has slavery taught even black people this with the rampant gay hate in the community? you can debate that all day without me…I will forget I posted this in a few minutes…. so don’t expect a response. I know where I stand. No debates needed). I have hopes for Africa as well. I hope they begin to reject the missionaries who urge them to convert to Islam or Christianity. Many of these ‘holy’ missions are really about European assimilation and religious hate. Most religions set up an Us vs Them mentality, leading to things like shunning all the way to removal of women’s genitalia and war.

    Everyone, everywhere, needs to rethink everything they were ever taught. Question everything. If you’re honest inside, you’ll find your truths. G’day all. Nice article.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ ZerosAndOnes

      I agree, we are giving mixed messages to the children. We beat them, and watch violent movies and TV programs where we admire the actors/actresses who acting violently toward other people, and then we tell our kids that violence is wrong and sit in amazement when they imitate what they see and have experienced.

      We do need to question EVERYTHING we have been taught, especially when the people who taught us and told us don’t even follow their own “rules”

      Bottom line, most of what we have learned in and out of school and in and out of the church WAS A LIE. The biggest gift you can give yourself is the ability AND the will to THINK FOR YOURSELF by learning how to FOLLOW THE LOGIC.

  41. Mbeti says:

    When I first posted my comment I had read the post but I did not have the time to read the comments.
    Now I have read all the comments up to now.
    First let me expand about my first comment.

    I was physically abused by my mother both me and my older sister,the rest of my
    sisters and brothers being in foster homes (lucky them).

    About this abuse – on several occasions blood was draw, I remember a instance
    where the belt buckle hit me in the back of my head and blood starting spurting
    out – then she shown momentary remorse.

    beatings where I would hug her to provide less of a target so she then would
    tie my hands to a doorknob.

    And my sister ,got it just as much if not worse.
    What was her(my mothers problem?) well I remember being taken with her to the
    hosiptal sometimes where she would see a psychiatrist and get medication.
    I remember the pills small blue and larger orange – stelazine and Thorazine.
    I remember some years after she died seeing a news program mentioning these two
    drugs and how it was wrong to give them to people.
    (note to self on goggling (researching these drugs)

    I remember that we where very poor, I remember the shame I felt when my mother
    would go begging to the local grocery store.

    Here’s a particularly interesting phenomena – once when I was young and mother
    had taken me to a store (this time buying something not begging) I think she
    did’t get me exactly what I wanted – when we got outside I threw a tantrum
    ,throwing the whatever she had bought me on the ground,and yelling screaming
    and crying : but here is the strange part I’ll never forget – do you know what
    I felt during and after – embarrassment and shame – and not from my mother
    (barely remember her response other that standard disapproval) or sister or any
    people around, no just from myself at myself.

    (note – my father was never there because he died when I was six months old in
    a hospital on the operating table – as I was told – no reason not to believe it)

    Another story on how this child abuse was/is a part of the low income black
    community.
    I remember how in about the third or fourth grade we had a class bully – mean
    young black male who would beat up everyone else and we all feared and hated
    him.
    well one day his mother comes to school at the request of our white female
    teacher (most all the teachers were white,it fact I don’t recall any black ones
    until joiner high and few and far between even then)
    anyway we kids all passed around the story of how if you acted badly enough in
    class your parent(in most cases mother) would come to school and beat you in
    front of the whole class – sorta worst case scenario of punishment.

    well with our resident bully that day this is exactly what happened.
    I remember how quiet we all became,and I remember what I felt for our resident
    bully who we allegedly hated and feared – sympathy and shame,shame for how
    another child was being treated by his own parent,sympathy for the
    embarrassment,shame and humiliation I knew he felt for what was being done to
    him.

    And as I think back now,outrage at the white teachers who allowed this to be
    done.

    Now one more story – this one from my later teen,young adult years just before
    I started out on my own.
    I was baby-sitting for my older sister (same one I grew up with) she had three
    kids at the time (by the same male with whom she was in a committed long term
    relationship)
    anyway I noticed something strange before she and he left,while I was alone
    with the kids and immediately after she and he came home.
    When I was alone with the kids they would sit quietly and calmly in from of the
    tv set and watch – no yelling ,running around etc
    but both before and after – they would be yelling,screaming ,ruining around etc

    Now I’m my sister’s younger brother and I was in no way allowed to physically
    “discipline” her kids in any way – I’d get in to trouble and my sister’s
    husband, while a decent man was definitely not someone to trifle with.

    Point – in does not require even the parent ,much less physical or verbal abuse
    to get children to behave – in this case we where to close in age and status i
    think for them to act out in front of me,I would not have respected them, and I
    think they knew it.

    I know I written a lot of words here ,but I needed to say this and not do I
    have a lot more to say but a lot more also needs to be said.

    As to the psychologist issue – years ago I thought seriously and tried to get
    psychology counseling – however just others have indicated if your black you
    face great barriers
    1.try to find a black psychologist
    2.try to say you want a black psychologist cause your black.
    3.find one if you mange to somehow get pass 1 and 2 ,who even acknowledges racism
    as a social phenomena worthy of serious consideration.

    anyway thank you trojanpam and sharon for your sympathy and concern,
    just as harsh words hurt ,kind words help and heal.

    I will definitely be commenting further on this topic.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ Mbeti

      Unfortunately, there are too many people who have suffered under the type of abuse you endured. I’m so sorry you had to go through that.

      As you said, getting the right kind of therapy is near impossible for most black people, which passes the mental issues from one generation to another.

      Thanks for sharing.

  42. Mbeti says:

    Reblogged this on Mbeti's Blog and commented:
    A discussion black people need to have.

  43. Shaunart says:

    I cannot tell you how courageous, you are. I am so humbled by your honesty. You are blessed from the most high. Thank you Mbeti.

  44. Mbeti says:

    Point – in does not require even the parent ,much less physical or verbal abuse
    to get children to behave –
    Another event/phenomena came to mind as I was reading what I wrote (apologies for the
    grammatical errors ,thought I proof read it thoroughly but apparently not well enough) – anyway
    this involved “some” white teachers I had during the same period and after that I described
    the child whose parent was allowed to beat him in front of the whole class.

    There where a few teachers, one male and another female, both of whom I noticed a strange
    phenomena which I thought a bit about at the time but never really (to my present recollection) discussed it with anyone.

    In their class just like when I was babysitting my sisters children ,no student ever acted
    up, and it wasn’t because they where mean or we wear afraid of them ,what it was I’m not
    sure ,the way they carried themselves? ,how they treated us ?
    (I even vividly remember one class where the male teacher was substituting and usually this was a clear signal for us students to do whatever ,but not this time and not with this teacher,in fact while I don’t remember the exact details, this teacher so involved the class in a such a lofty discussion that he had asked me a question about what was time and said I explained it!)

    Although at the time I didn’t even fully know what I was talking about nor fully understood
    the answer I gave.

    Anyway the point of this and these stories is that beating children is abnormal,unnecessary and
    counterproductive, indeed the same applies to adults , you don’t get compliance nor
    cooperation through abuse – only resentment,fear and hate.

    Something most of our species(or just a good portion of it) still has yet to learn or evolve
    to.

    @Shaunart
    thank you for your kind words.

    @TrojanPam
    I’ve neglected to read your previous comments on this page in regards to the mental health
    profession so absorbed I was/am in my own situation/story, apologies ; you’ve addressed this issue
    quite expertly and I will be rereading this entire page very carefully.

    Thank you for your insight and commitment.

    • TrojanPam says:

      @ mbeti

      who said: “beating children is abnormal,unnecessary and counterproductive, indeed the same applies to adults , you don’t get compliance nor cooperation through abuse – only resentment,fear and hate.”

      That’s an excellent point and a great example. How do adults respond to intimidation, verbal abuse and beatings?

      So, why would we expect a child to “learn” from that kind of treatment? Fear is NOT respect. Fear leads to anger, contempt, hatred, violence, and self-contempt.

      It’s way past time to break the cycle and the curse of 400 years of chattel slavery

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